Every single day, we ask our dogs to be something they were never designed to be. We ask them to be less dog.
Walk on a leash and don’t pull, even though dogs naturally cover far more ground than any human. Don’t bark, even though barking is one of the primary ways they communicate. Don’t stop and sniff, even though sniffing is how dogs gather information, process their environment, and interact with the world around them. Don’t jump, even though jumping is a natural and enthusiastic greeting behavior. Don’t dig, even though digging is an innate canine behavior, and some breeds have been selectively developed specifically for their digging ability.
Don’t steal food off the counter, even though dogs are scavengers by nature and counter surfing makes complete biological sense. Don’t chase squirrels or rabbits or anything that moves quickly, even though prey drive is hardwired into their species and many breeds were developed alongside humans as hunting partners. Don’t have big feelings about being left alone for hours at a stretch, but do be warm, snuggly, and fully engaged the moment we walk back through the door. Don’t chew, even though chewing is a healthy and necessary outlet. And please behave perfectly in public, even when we’ve put them into environments they were never trained or prepared to handle.
When you stop and think about all of that, it’s remarkable. It is genuinely remarkable how well most dogs do manage to navigate our expectations, our schedules, and our very human way of organizing the world. We make the choice to bring dogs into our lives, and then we expect them not to behave like the species they are.
We don’t deserve dogs.
We ask far too much from them, and yet, they keep showing up for us anyway. What do they ask from us in return? They love us unconditionally. They’re perhaps the only relationship in our lives that is truly non-transactional – there’s no score being kept, no resentment being stored, no invoice waiting at the end of the month. They are just here, giving us love and and connection and are happy you exist.
So here’s what I want to offer instead of another list of things to stop your dog from doing: let your dog be a dog.
But, not in a passive way, but very intentionally. Curate real opportunities for your dog to engage in the behaviors that come naturally to them. Take a sniffari instead of a structured walk. Offer a dig pit. Provide appropriate chew outlets every single day. Set up enrichment that uses their senses and satisfies their instincts. Create the conditions for your dog to feel like a dog, not a four-legged roommate who’s perpetually in trouble for just existing.
Training absolutely has its place. I spend my career helping people teach their dogs skills that make shared life safer and more harmonious, and it’s important. But training works best when it’s paired with understanding and respect for who dogs actually are and what they bring with their species. When we stop fighting their nature and start working with it, everything gets easier, and more importantly, everything gets kinder. You wouldn’t ask a goldfish to exist on land and be upset that they couldn’t survive, so don’t expect unreasonable things from your dog either.
Your dog is doing their best in a world that was not built for them. The least we can do is meet them halfway.
If you saw yourself in any of these examples, please know I’m not writing this to make you feel bad. I’m writing it because I believe that when people have better information, they make better choices for their dogs. That’s the whole reason I do this work. If you want to understand your dog’s body language more deeply, or if you’re navigating fear, reactivity, or a difficult behavior, I’m here to help. Let’s work together and help you help your dog. If you’re ready to take the first step towards this, you can schedule your session here!
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